Monday, December 31, 2012

I'm Naive

My only problem with guns is that they make it far too easy for stupid people to kill me.”
and I tell ya that exorcist gal who piddled on the carpet caused less of a ruckus then I did with what I thought was a pretty mild statement. I wasn't even hinting at taking guns away from stupid people. With that one fairly mild statement a seemingly reasonable rational woman is transformed into a screaming ( I hope she doesn't chuck the meatloaf at me ) nut job.
I am now the enemy. The socialist comunist take your guns away big brother loves you hippy freak.
(Ohh god lord I do have a talent for saying precisely the wrong thing. If only I could learn to use this power for good.)
Because some one is now screaming at you, you feel the spines start to come out the eyes are going cat feral, the teeth are growing sharp behind a polite smile. You want to snap her heels together like a drill Sargent to a fresh boot.
Check it,
You have a 'support our troops' bumper sticker on your car.
I served in the army
you 'wanted' to join the army but couldn't lose enough weight to even qualify for boot camp.
Your husband of 5 years, is a nice fellow but, he is grand negas of the local masons secret hide out
My (ex now but 15 years married to ) was Army EOD that is bomb squad for you civilians,
I have owned guns, shot guns. I once got tossed out of Canada for trying to drive through a bit of Canada with my gun locked and un loaded in the trunk of my car. The Canadians were very polite but quite firm. And told me to just go away and not try and slip back across the border again, any time soon. But say like maybe in the spring you can come back eh? I was very embarrassed.
I don't say any of that. She is a nice lady,,usually. I keep my snark in check. I try, very nicely, (I'm not yelling unlike some people) to explain.
She calls me naive
my head explodes. It's not a big sound, just a small little pop.
Naive? Naive?
This from a woman who once got a butterfly tattooed on her shoulder and to this day thinks, that was daring.
As a retired whore there are a number of names I rather expected to be called....naive was not one I had ever considered. Ok sure I look like a perfectly normal person. It' not like I have retired whore tattooed on my forehead. Not even sporting a red Letter A on my clothes. (though I have considered it but decided it would come off more Laverne and Shirley then as a political statement against puritanism. )
But.. seriously how many dicks do you have to suck before that shiny penny nimbus erodes? And what ever that number is, I'm pretty gol dern danged sure I done past it waay back a when.
And she is still yelling at me.
'If you had EVER, any experience with crime and or bad guys, you’d change your mind then. “ I retire to the living room pouring myself an extra large drink on the way.
why ohh why is it always me who has to be polite to people who yell stupid shit at me? I'm the crazy person. I have fucking papers saying I'm the crazy person. I'm the paranoid wack job here. If anyone's going to be yelling about crime guns and conspiracies I feel it should be me. 
 But it isn’t,
 it never is.


  1. There are just some subjects that well never fail to rile people up: guns, abortion, and religion would definitely be in the top 3. For the record I completely agree with you!

  2. I think it was a pretty mild statement too. Sorry you're getting yelled at, that's never fun.

  3. I don't mind a good discussion, heck I'm the first one to argue anything.. To me a good argument is like sharpening a knife on a whet stone. I actually spend more time reading ideas I disagree with then I do those I agree with. If there is a flaw in my thinking it's the people who disagree with me who will be kind enough to point it out. But, there are people (like the gal who was screaming at me) who confuse philosophical disagreement and discussion with insult. And then jumps right to assumption, placing me to play the roll of her imagined villain. And in so doing she begins an argument with that villain, filling in a whole life story of who I am what I have lived and done that in fact is the exact opposite of truth. So I pour myself a drink a sit a passive audience to the argument she continues to have with her 'alice through the looking glass' me. It has happened to me before, ( and maybe it's just me this happens to) But there are times when I completely withdraw from all discussion, but the other person doesn't notice that they are the only one in argument. Not only do they keep arguing, but very weirdly they begin filling in my side of the argument. Like the whole thing is a play and danged if they ant pissed I ant saying my lines a'tall right.

  4. On New Years Eve I was in a house filled with people who all seemed to believe the same things and to think the same way. I found myself disagreeing with more than a few of the uncontested assertions, but there's no way in the world I was going to make any contradictory comments. It wasn't a good time for an argument, and besides I don't think it is my duty to be the poster boy for the opposition.

  5. "Naive? Naive?
    This from a woman who once got a butterfly tattooed on her shoulder and to this day thinks, that was daring".

    A very witty post... As a woman I will give you some advice: try to avoid arguments with women at least when you are getting to know them more deeply... After a couple of months you will be the King and due to that and therefore allowed to do whatever you want.

    Best regards Aquileana ;)